You Left The Oven On!

“Wake up you Idiot you left the oven on!”

As I started to come to I noticed that I was sitting up on the couch with all of my pink gear still on. After finding some clues (like the frozen pizza on the counter next to the oven) I determined that I must have fallen asleep unexpectedly. My roommate/landlord was not happy as this was, according to him, the 4^th or 5^th time I have done this. So what happened, and how did a regular kickball night turn into almost burning down the house?

I guess it all began on the kickball field. The white team played the pink team in a heated game. An older fellow in our leauge, lets call him Ron, decided that he would be the head ref, despite the fact that he was playing, and overturned several calls from the real ref. I would have complained except the overturned calls actually hurt Ron’s team.

Later in the game one girl was hit in the chest really hard with the ball. It looked like it hurt. Instead of asking if she was OK, I told her that I was jealous of the ball because “you never let me touch your REDACTED”. It was a close game, and everyone went to the bar angrily, except Ron who went to the bar old.

I was not caught up much in the kickball rivalry, and so at the bar I decided to hang out with all my good friends on the opposing team. I tried to be nice a girl on the opposing team interrupted me. She told me that she didn’t hate me because “You are a dumb ass and we got you out.” This received a round of “cheers” from the rest of her team. Girl 1, me 0.

After that, another girl introduced herself. She looked different than she did earlier in the day when she was on top of another girl either fighting or loving. I don’t want to say their names or describe in detail what they were doing, but you could say I haven't seen that much 'Gina since I saw those Brittney Spears getting out of the car photos. (can u guess their names?)

Next on the tour were other girls from previous Kickball Hangover stories. The reactions ranged from “I didn’t even read it” to being completely avoided and ignored. Its all a joke and not true…kind of!!! I even promised one girl that she would make the site, and the conclusion of this sentence means that I wasn’t lying.

Luckily the night was saved because a girl gave me a ride home! THANKS, but why in the hell do you have disco lighting in your car!?

So this morning as I set the oven to off, I went over the facts in my head. I spent $70 on a random Thursday night at a relatively cheap bar. I embarrassed myself in front of everyone at the bar not only with my outfit, but with my personality. I made several girls hate me. I played 0 holes of Golden Tee. I was in an empty bar on an empty dance floor dancing the night away. Plus I was late for work already and my car was a $30 cab ride away. When you put it that way it sounds kind of … AWESOME!